False advertising is nothing new. From hyperactive snake oil salesmen pitching toxic “health” tonics from the back of horse-drawn wagons to modern day “melt away the fat” diet scams on the internet, for as long as there has been something to sell, there have been deceitful ways of selling it. Today, abortion advocates hawk female empowerment, but that’s not the product on the shelf.

The pro-choice pitch casts a very wide net. Who is ever going to say they are against the concept of choice? It would be abhorrent. Un-American even. No, choice is an easy sell. Once on board comes the other stuff—the importance of fulfilling educational and career advancement goals on the way to realizing one’s potential as a full member of society. Very American. The more strident of the sisterhood may launch into Handmaiden’s Tale scenarios and the need to stave off stealth mind-control tactics of the patriarchy, but most gals have a husband and kids at home and little time or energy for such histrionics. They are, however, very susceptible to the reproductive “rights” trigger and willing to go into the voting booth to enshrine abortion-up-to-birth in their state constitutions. But this is redundant, because there is already the save-the-life-of-the-mother rule, which is the only legitimate, medically necessary reason for aborting during the birth process. Any other case where the mother’s life is in danger can be resolved by taking the baby via C-section. So why the—pardon the expression—overkill of these through-the-ninth-month initiatives other than a paganistic consecration of “choice” and “freedom?” This is a long way from the original, however hyperbolic, selling point dramatized with the rusty coat hanger motif, which at least was purportedly about women’s safety, not egomaniacal ideologies. Once all the pseudo pragmatic reasons have been aired though, the real argument, short, jaded, petulant and sotto voce, comes from the corner of the mouth: Men can do what they want.

And there it is. It’s a man’s world, and abortion is how women even the score. Then comes the second sentence, not so sotto: Men will never change. Both statements are true. Even more infuriating is how most guys blithely accept their advantageous station in life, perhaps as part of a natural order belief or as just the lucky hand they drew. It is what it is, and why would they want to change it? Sometimes they are not so blithe, and at first blush, appear to be on our side. Case in point:

I buy my morning newspaper from the convenience store around the corner. It’s a family business run by a guy from Sri Lanka and his sister. I like to ask immigrants about their homeland to show respect for their origins, and with this in mind inquired with a smile, “So, what’s it like in Sri Lanka?” The sister said: “It rains.” So much for that. The brother likes to talk politics and I’m happy to oblige. One morning the topic was abortion, and his position was clear: “Some women just can’t handle being pregnant, and if she can’t handle it, she shouldn’t have to.” His manner was gallant, and then I got it: This was his idea of being chivalrous! Sir Galahad steadfastly protecting the damsels! I then asked him, “So, if you were seeing a woman, and you knew she was someone who ‘just couldn’t handle being pregnant,’ would you still sleep with her?” A cloud crossed over his eyes. Then he mumbled something about apples and oranges. His sister giggled.

It’s a man’s world. And men won’t change. Fighting it is useless, thinking otherwise is naïve, and getting through the proverbial day means coping with it. Jazz it up with Women’s Studies theories deemed empowering because a famous feminist said they were and then everybody agreed to agree with her. Beats facing the truth that you’re being finagled into passionately fighting for abortion “rights” because Men Will Never Change and there’s nothing you can do about it except just . . . surrender. That’s the product on the shelf.

I remember a story, and many of you may have heard it, which may provide food for thought for this question of capitulation. It’s from a very early time in the Vietnam War. It was years before the anti-war movement began. We were over there but no one was paying any attention, except one fellow. Every day, he would march all by himself back and forth in front of the White House carrying his Out of Vietnam picket sign. No newspaper or television station covered it, he was completely ignored even though he was out there all day, every day. Finally, a reporter got curious, not about his “cause,” but about him. And so the reporter approached the solitary protester and asked him just what he thought he was going to accomplish “You’ve been out here for months and months and it’s going nowhere. Don’t you realize,” he asked, “that you’re never going to change anyone’s mind?” The protester replied: “I know I will never change them. I do this so they don’t change me.”

Men won’t change, but women have. It’s not your grandmother’s abortion.