Share the Darkness with a Righteous Kiss
Ah, the June wedding season. I was at one recently that keeps coming back to mind.
The dress was gorgeous, the bride was radiant, the reception was lovely. Amazingly, at the bride and groom’s first dance, I could actually hear the words of the song, “Share the Darkness”:
Now that we trust each other,
Why don’t you stay with me?
Why don’t we share the darkness tonight
Make it warm and burning bright.
If I had heard that at a college dance, I would have rolled my eyes because the words are way too suggestive. But this night I watched the newlyweds twirl, right hands clasped tightly, left arms enfolding one another. Their eyes were on each other, in each other’s glance. There was something between them that you only rarely see.
There had been exuberance when they came down the aisle and when they were announced as they entered the reception, and excitement and delight in every greeting given and congratulation accepted.
But the dance was different. Between them was a private electricity.
Why don’t we share the darkness tonight
Make it warm and shining bright.
From watching their faces and their eyes it was clear that this, in fact, was going to be the first night in which this couple shared the darkness. For this wedding, the song was right.
They had known each other for ten years. He was her first love. When she was in college and had never gone out with anybody else, she had complied obediently when her mother urged her to date others. But none could compare to him. It had taken him years to finish his education and land a job. They had waited a long time, they knew each other well, and they were ready. So many wouldn’t have waited, but this couple had. And it showed.
Now that we trust each other,
Why don’t you stay with me?
They had waited not until they merely trusted each other. They had waited until they placed rings on each other’s hands and knelt before an altar and received two sacraments together, so that all the powers of Heaven would be with them, to help them to stay with each other forever.
And tonight was going to be the first time they shared the darkness. There was no need to dissemble. There was no need to hide the righteous joy of their excitement.
Yes, the wedding was a big huge ceremony. Yes, this couple’s first sharing of the darkness was a big huge deal. And so it should be.
The pro-life movement throughout the world fights to protect every human life that begins in any manner: vicious, painful, unnatural, criminal, perverse, unwanted. Those lives are every bit as beautiful and as valuable as lives that begin in pure, beautiful married love.
Our concern to protect the former should not let us forget that the latter remains the ideal, the ideal we should never cease to pursue, the ideal we should never cease to celebrate—in Shakespeare’s phrase, “with a righteous kiss.”
* * * * *
Connie Marshner organized her first pro-life meeting in 1971, among Capitol Hill staffers who sensed a drift toward legalizing abortion. She’s worked in the movement in one capacity or another ever since.
A touching and beautiful reflection, Connie. I wish all homilists could see your last two paragraphs as a reminder.
— Mike
Thank you, Mike.
It’s hard to talk about an ideal when we live in a world in which we’re supposed to tremble in fear that somebody’s feelings might get hurt.
A very important insight into the importance of chastity in the face of the hookup culture. So many young people are getting conned today–with disastrous results!
Russell,
Thank you! I am honored that a writer of your stature commented!! There’s so much political correctness on one side, which dismisses the traditional view as mere self-righteousness on the other. I hope I managed to convey the real excitement at the wedding of a chaste couple. It’s really a uniquely beautiful event.
This article says it all. It is something parents and their teens should read rogether. I think it might trigger some conversations between them, please God I look forward to what is to come.
Thank you, Georgianna!
I agree — It would be great if parents and teens did that! It would give the mom (or dad) a chance to tell the daughter or son how rewarding it is to “wait” — the whole culture sends the opposite message of “no big deal”, and I’m not sure overbusy parents even realize what their kids are up against.
Beautiful! If I could do it over again, this would be my story too. Thank you for sharing this.
Molly,
Thank you–your appreciation is beautiful! Especially in what you imply are your circumstances, your ability to rise above your own experience and be objective about a greater good is admirable. Did you see my column of June 4 for Dawn Eden’s story: http://humanlifereview.com/love-fully-and-completely-an-alternative-to-unpronounceable-chemicals/
Beautiful.
Beautiful story. Somehow I feel this generation has missed the innocence and excitement we had as children growing up into young adults. Looking back you can see the gradual erosion of our morals. It is difficult to stop the clock and go back to where we would like to be. However, we need to use every moment we get to speak out and give a short lesson on life and do what we know is the right thing.
There is a beauty to chastity that many people in today’s world do not have eyes to see. I pray that the day will soon arrive when abstinence until marriage will again be valued in our culture and embraced as an achievable ideal. Connie, your article is a lovely presentation of what that looks like.
Beautifully put. The prolife movement has been so profoundly successful in America, even if the ultimate ends have not yet been achieved. What would happen if the Crisis Pregnancy Center movement married the Marriage movement? Only good things…